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contributed by Doug Anderson If you are in a relationship that is in trouble, there is a good chance that you are feeling bewildered, hurt, or angry. Perhaps it has been a few different things that have recently come to a head, or maybe something happened that was deliberately or accidentally destructive. The truth is, all relationships have problems, and the real test of a relationship comes when things are bad. If you want to save a relationship that is floundering, you'll find that there are definitely some things that you need to think about. 1.Think about why you want to save your relationship.When you are thinking about saving a relationship that is on the rocks, take a moment and think about what you are fighting for. What kind of relationship do you need, and can you get it from the person that you are currently with? The fact that you love someone is a good reason to think about staying together; being comfortable or afraid of change is a sign that a break up might be for the best. The more you know about your own motivations, the better your chances towards mending the relationship will be. 2.Can you forgive?Depending on what happened, there may be a great deal that needs to be forgiven. Maybe you caught your partner in an act of infidelity, or maybe money was lost or stolen. If this is the case, think about whether or not you can look at your partner in the same way as before. If you can't forgive them, really forgive them, then it might be time to to give up the ghost. 3.Talk it outSo many relationship problems happen just because people don't talk and don't communicate. Set aside some time, a whole day if necessary, and simply talk things out. Talk about everything that is bothering you, make sure that you understand what happened, how it happened and why it happened. Ask all the questions that you want to ask, and be totally honest when you are looking for answers. This is important to think about, and you might be surprised at what is revealed. 4.Cut out poisonous influencesIs there a person or a situation that always causes problems in your relationship? You'll find that if there is something that is poisoning your relationship, whether it is a personal acquaintance, an activity or a location that you will simply want to cut it out of your life. Think about how important your relationship is and act accordingly. 5.Don't be afraid to say "I love you"After problems in a relationship, many couples are awkward with those all important words. Remember that ideally, if you mean it, you should say it. This will help you get back to a place that feels normal and safe. About the Author: Doug is the owner of the Superior Health Information web site and writes about relationship issues. He also teaches various languages at Learn a Language Faster! |
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